I need help. And I`ll be enjoy my life.

I need help. And I'll be enjoy my life.

Suddenly, I considered about my life today and I began to regret about my life.
I have dream. It is same with dream having till now since I was very young. Only, it is crystallised gradually. I ran for it till now, but I think just now that is farther run that is walking for a moment.
I didn't wrong or not be immoral. I intercepted myself thoroughly about temptation that I fall.
No video game, No drug, No card, No gambling....
I think I was boring exemplary. My hobby is take a photo. That's all. :|
I like help someone. However, I did not try to help me myself till now.
It is dream that I become very good biomedical engineer and make useful excellent medical equipment to everybody. I could not go to college of medicine because I am not smart. Of course, it is similar now.
And I want to be fervent biomedical Engineer who have hot mind that can hug a person on hot mind.
But I have many problems. It's okay because I have more time for it.
I am going to learn method that live happily enjoying.
Take part in delightful party and talk with friends joyfully and help peoples by happy mind and live.
And I am going to try my dream so that is possible more fast.
I need friends who can help as I can make my life joyfully.
I am so naive. So, I need experience of other culture specially.

So, I changed my Blog to all Englishes. Learning becomes many helps to evaluate the person.
And I like that write. Only, have disadvantage very to express my spirit because is using in English now, but I am going to try continuously.
If someone can happify me, I am going to help willingly anytime for the friend.

My first target is Halloween party. How can I enjoy it?
I don't want only drink. if drink alcohol can stabilize and can make joyfully mind, but it get poisoned by alcohol than It will be change gullish and broke the person's life.

Okay!

Somebody can help me? :) Please...

~ Ben.